Phd FOMO

Korean Version

The latest NeurIPS received over 30k paper submissions, and next year’s ICLR received over 43k. Amid this flood of papers, arXiv has introduced a limit of two submissions per month. To prepare for growing LLM use and a potential surge in submissions, RSS is even introducing a two-stage review process for 2027: hypotheses and methods are reviewed first, and authors then complete their papers based on reviewer feedback.

Meanwhile, I can barely manage one paper a year.

A few months ago, I went through a period when I woke up every morning feeling afraid. Had someone published the research I was working on while I was asleep? Whenever I came across a paper with a similar title, my heart sank. As those days added up, so did the stress. For the first time in my life, I turned to melatonin to help me sleep. It wasn’t that I thought my research had no value. If anything, believing in its value made me more afraid. I thought the problem mattered and the approach was worthwhile, but what if someone planted their flag first? I was afraid that months of thinking and experimenting would turn into something someone else had already done, with nothing new left to offer. And I was afraid that I was falling far behind as a researcher. That was roughly what FOMO felt like to me.

Back Then

When I started graduate school in 2019, one reason I chose Graphics was that I thought I wouldn’t have to rush as much as I would in ML or CV. The research cycle seemed a little longer. I hoped I could take time to reflect on my work without constantly feeling chased. At least, that was how I saw it then.

And for a while, that was true. The paper I submitted to RSS 2022 took nearly two years, from when we started working on it in early 2020 to submission in 2022. Even so, I wasn’t in a hurry. I just couldn’t imagine anyone else doing something like this.

My SIGGRAPH Asia 2024 paper was similar. The research itself was already finished in the winter of 2023, but for various internal reasons at the company, we spent another five months on the write-up before submitting in May. I wasn’t particularly worried. There weren’t many people working on gesture generation, and I didn’t think a very similar paper would appear even if we took another year to write ours.

Of course, there was still stress, as there is with any research. But I was worried about how to solve the problem, not whether someone else was already solving it.

FOMO in the Physical AI ERA

Things started to change in 2025, as Physical AI became a major topic worldwide. My field had previously been a little outside the main spotlight. Now, everyone was jumping in. Meanwhile, LLMs were producing remarkable results every few months, and paper submissions were growing rapidly.

Keeping up with new papers already felt like more than I had time for, and I still had my own research to do. When I returned to academia for my PhD in 2025, my field had become quite competitive. I found myself in a race to plant a flag, something I had never really taken part in before. It felt as even a short break would leave me far behind. That was when my FOMO started.

But what could I do? The world wasn’t going to stop because I was scared. If anything, things were changing faster. So I’ve been finding ways to deal with FOMO and keep doing research. Maybe it’s still there somewhere, and I’ve just gotten better at keeping it under control. What matters, I think, is that I’m no longer just sitting there afraid.

I want to share a few things that have helped me. I wouldn’t say I’ve overcome FOMO, but I’ve at least found ways to make it more manageable. I approached it from two sides: dealing with FOMO within research, and managing fear and stress outside of it.

Within Research: A Little Strategic Blame

If you’re familiar with Korean gaming memes, you may know the phrase “flexible blame-shifting.” Basically, being flexible about whose fault it is. As it turns out, this mindset has helped me deal with FOMO in research, too.

Academia Is Unfair

The first step is accepting that academia is unfair. When I was younger, I thought the world is terribly unfair, while academia seemed like an idealistic, almost beautiful world. But recognizing that this place is unfair too has helped me cope with FOMO.

I want to be careful here. I’m not saying we should simply accept unfairness. But if we attribute every difference in outcomes to our own ability or effort, it becomes hard to keep going. Sometimes, a paper that looks like it was put together with a few AI-assisted experiments and prompts gets into a good conference, while the paper I spent a year pouring myself into gets rejected. Of course, I can’t know how much work went into someone else’s paper. Still, it’s hard not to feel frustrated when that happens. If I take every such outcome as proof that I’m not good enough, my FOMO only gets worse. Sometimes, I need to be able to say that the world was already unfair, and this time I got unlucky. That gives me enough motivation to try again.

Of course, taken the wrong way, this can turn you into someone who refuses to listen and insists they are always right. What I mean is that we should do our best on work we believe matters, while learning to be a little less attached to the outcome. For me, it helps to remember that this field is unfair, and doing the work well doesn’t always guarantee a good result.

When in Doubt, Trust Your Supervisor

Trusting your supervisor helps, too. Believe that they know what they’re doing and follow their guidance. If the research doesn’t go well, I recommend quietly blaming them.

When a similar paper comes out, I might immediately think I’m in serious trouble, but my supervisor may see it differently. They can help me figure out whether to keep going, what to change, and whether there is really something to worry about. Most supervisors have far more research experience than we do. Trusting their experience and judgment is better than trying to make every decision and take responsibility for everything alone. I think that’s part of a supervisor’s role. (Writing this is making me feel a little guilty toward my own supervisors. I really should thank them more often.)

If you’re a professor reading this, unfortunately, I don’t have much advice for you. I’m still a graduate student, so I can’t pretend to understand what you deal with. All I can offer is my appreciation to the professors out there.

No Two Studies Are Exactly Alike

I also try to remind myself that no two studies are exactly alike. Even when they address similar problems, their assumptions, methods, and scope can differ. Those small differences may lead to unexpected findings, and those findings can become a contribution of their own. A similar paper appearing doesn’t immediately make my work meaningless.

Of course, the contributions may genuinely overlap, and I may need to change direction. But that’s a judgment to make after actually reading the paper. There’s no need to decide that my work is worthless based on the title alone. First, I need to understand how much overlaps and what else I can do.

Outside Research: A Change of Scene

Vancouver has great weather. At least, when it’s not raining, it’s really nice. Going outside for a short walk on those days helps me worry a little less about papers. I can get stuck thinking about the same thing at my desk, then feel a bit better just by stepping outside. Wherever you live, there’s probably something that can draw your attention away from research for a while. For me, getting some fresh air and looking up at the sky has helped a lot.

Enjoy Your Leisure Time

Hobbies help clear your head. When you’re afraid of falling behind, they can feel like a luxury, which only makes you cling more tightly to work. But spending a little time thinking about something else is necessary, too. Read a book. Exercise. Play a game. Eternal Return, available to download now.

Jokes aside, having something to focus on outside research matters. If I spend my breaks reading papers and checking other people’s achievements on LinkedIn, I don’t really feel rested afterward. As an aside, LinkedIn feels like a PhD FOMO factory to me. When my FOMO gets bad, deliberately staying off LinkedIn helps. Even a short time spent focusing on something else can make a difference.

Friends and Family

Personally, my biggest source of support is my family and friends. People who care about me regardless of which conference accepts my paper or how novel my method is. Even when research isn’t going well, sharing a meal and talking about nothing in particular helps me feel better. Sometimes, spending time with family and friends is exactly what I need.

Alternatives

If you don’t have someone to lean on right now, how about an anime character? I often think of Commander Erwin Smith, still pushing forward after his arm gets bitten off. The situation is unfair, and trying hard doesn’t guarantee a good outcome. Still, you struggle and try to do something anyway. It’s a bit random, but this kind of thing helps me.

Advance!

Closing Thoughts

Writing all this doesn’t mean I’ve overcome FOMO. My heart might sink again tomorrow morning when I see a similar paper. But I’m trying not to take that as a sign that everything I’ve done so far was meaningless.

Academia is unfair. And we chose to enter it, hoping to do something worthwhile. If you ask whether I knew it would be like this when I signed up, I don’t have much of an answer. But here I am.

I can’t stop the fear from showing up. Still, I want to keep my footing and continue the research I set out to do. There are problems I haven’t solved yet, and things I still want to find out.

My father-in-law once shared a saying with my wife and me.

“우보천리.” (牛步千里, Woo-bo-cheon-ri)

Even an ox, with its slow steps, can travel a thousand miles. I may not be able to run like a horse, but today, I’ll try to take one more slow step.

Reference

RSS: https://roboticsconference.org/
Eternal Retrun : https://store.steampowered.com/app/1049590/Eternal_Return/
Attack on Titan: https://blog.naver.com/cowhdals1111/222857609362